" Peter was instantly uncomfortable and worried about her."Yeah. It taught me that my body is not my ally in life. It has an agenda as well, which sometimes does not coincide with my own. I hated him. I hated him so much I fantasized about how I would kill him. And yet, when he grabbed me by my hair and pushed me down onto my bed, I would get so wet. Every fucking time." Steph, are you okay? I mean, after all that happened, can I call someone?" No, I just want you to understand something about me. I know you like me, but you need to understand some things about me before you get too close. I don't want you to feel like I led you on, or lied to you. I'm fucked up, Peter. You know the saying, don't stick your dick in crazy? I'm crazy." Look, stop beating yourself up about this. Sure, I like you, but I am not about to try anything right now. You've just been knocked around, for God's sake, Steph." Please let me finish what I want to say. And if you want me to sleep on the couch tonight,. I knew that my time with Roger would not end with dinner. I consideredmyself heterosexual, but as I cross dressed more and more, I did findmyself looking at websites and photographs depicting transvestiteshaving sex with men. Some of it was erotic and some of it was just plainfilthy pornography, but as the years went on, I found myself wonderingwhat it would be like to sexually surrender to a man while dressed as awoman. I suspected that tonight was going to be that night. When thatthought popped into my head, I felt and even deeper rush of heat thanbefore and knew in my heart of hearts that I would be having sex withRoger that night.Roger nudged me. "Penny for your thoughts?"I looked over and my companion and soon to be lover. "I was wondering ifyou have experience with people like me in the past. I'm also wonderinghow I measure up to them."Roger smiled. "So far Simone, you leave most of them behind in the dust.You're so comfortable in the role of a woman, and it shows in.
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